If ur best friend betray u, will u still befriend with her?

• lv_gal

  9 Jun 03, 11:15

  If ur best friend betray u, will u still befriend with her? what would u do in ur next step?
  
• oceanic

  9 Jun 03, 11:19

  if e friendship is sth u treasure alot... try to forgive lor
• lv_gal

  9 Jun 03, 11:39

  Originally posted by oceanic:

  if e friendship is sth u treasure alot... try to forgive lor

  but the things she does reali deeper my anger towards her... if she also treasure this friendship, why she ought to do this thing to me? is it Man are selfish? To save itself, willingly to betray their closed ones and even their conscience.
• choco B

  9 Jun 03, 11:47

  Nothing lasts forever. Sometimes partings are inevitable, just take it in your stride and forget about it lar. Do what you have to do and don't be angry over it.
• millennium

  9 Jun 03, 11:48

  Forgive but not forget.
• oceanic

  9 Jun 03, 11:49

  Originally posted by lv_gal:

  but the things she does reali deeper my anger towards her... if she also treasure this friendship, why she ought to do this thing to me? is it Man are selfish? To save itself, willingly to betray their closed ones and even their conscience.

  sometimes ppl just fall into temptation n sin and do e wrong stuffs... so best is try to forgive her .. u will feel better
• angel911

  9 Jun 03, 12:04

  Originally posted by millennium:

  Forgive but not forget.

  So far, I've heard noting but "Forgive & Forget". I've not heard about yours. But what Forgive and Forget REALLY means is that we forgive the person, forget the person's wrong-doings, and then, NEVER dig the past out from your mind again.
  
  This means you forgive the person no matter how serious the offence is.
• oceanic

  9 Jun 03, 13:37

  Originally posted by angel911:
  
  
  So far, I've heard noting but "Forgive & Forget". I've not heard about yours. But what Forgive and Forget REALLY means is that we forgive the person, forget the person's wrong-doings, and then, NEVER dig the past out from your mind again.
  
  [b]This means you forgive the person no matter how serious the offence is.[/b]

  agree... there's not a forgiveness if u forgive but u dun forget.. u're just carrying the pain and anger with u when u dun forget
• Hushpuppy

  9 Jun 03, 13:51

  Actually Human are beri Selfish one ...This kind Of Selfishness is well known throughtout the Globe.....So if yu are able to act as nthing had happened before, that is better for you...If yu really wanna this friend then approach her and befriend her all over again...But Deep in your heart, Yu knoe know what is the best for you, neber Gonna to Trust this Person anymore...Just Treat her as a normal friend will Do...
• curad

  9 Jun 03, 13:53

  it actually depends on thw whle situation..i tihnk some ppl have read my story abt mi n my fren lor..then they know.......
• FiRe_BLaDe

  9 Jun 03, 15:15

  Originally posted by lv_gal:
  [b]If ur best friend betray u, will u still befriend with her? what would u do in ur next step?
  i had a very close friend whom share ups and downs. but in an incident (cannot tell for some reasons), we fall out. we saw each other in school sometimes but treat each other invisible. furthermore, she spread my bad words behind my back to others as if want to gain pity from them and let them knew that I'm wrong for what it happen. Actually, both parties are in wrong, but why she put all the blame on me and deny all?
  [/b]

  well...other ppl got eyes to c,who's gd or bad so if continue 2 spread bad words abt u,u oso cant do naitihing lor...its her mouth wat.
  if u realli treasure tis friendship then u might wan 2 approach her to solve the misunderstanding between both of u.if she dnt wish clear it,then tink u got no choice bt 2 leave her alone & 4get tis friendship.
• lv_gal

  9 Jun 03, 15:42

  Originally posted by FiRe_BLaDe:

  well...other ppl got eyes to c,who's gd or bad so if continue 2 spread bad words abt u,u oso cant do naitihing lor...its her mouth wat.
  if u realli treasure tis friendship then u might wan 2 approach her to solve the misunderstanding between both of u.if she dnt wish clear it,then tink u got no choice bt 2 leave her alone & 4get tis friendship.

  actually i nv thought of friending her bk cos my anger wont supressed no matter how long the time is. wat i can say after seeing some advice above are "forget her" but "wont forgive her". anyways thanks for those advice given.
  Lastly i would say nv trust ur friends soooo much if nt u will regret like what i'm now.
  "even ur closed ones might betray you too"
• millennium

  9 Jun 03, 16:02

  Originally posted by angel911:
  
  
  So far, I've heard noting but "Forgive & Forget". I've not heard about yours. But what Forgive and Forget REALLY means is that we forgive the person, forget the person's wrong-doings, and then, NEVER dig the past out from your mind again.
  
  [b]This means you forgive the person no matter how serious the offence is.[/b]

  For the case it was never said how serious the offence is and how you expect others to judge the seriousness?
  
  It is not easy to be person to be best friend. Because of one betray and best friend can become enemy, I can said that the so call best friend cannot withstand anything at all.
  
  Forgive the best friend, don't forget what he/she had done, take it as a lesson learnt and beware of him/her in future.
• millennium

  9 Jun 03, 16:03

  Originally posted by oceanic:

  agree... there's not a forgiveness if u forgive but u dun forget.. u're just carrying the pain and anger with u when u dun forget

  Where is the pain and anger when you already forgive?
• oceanic

  9 Jun 03, 16:11

  Originally posted by millennium:

  Where is the pain and anger when you already forgive?

  what i meant was that if u forgive n u dun forget e pain and anger is still with u... so tts why
• |Uv`-f|UtE-`

  9 Jun 03, 16:13

  i'll try to find out the reason y she will put our friendship at stake n betrayed me.. if i cant get a valid reason from her.. i'll juz forget abt befriending her again..
  if anger n resentment is oredi there n nothing can suppress it , even if we r still frens , it wun be base on true friendship..
• Almighty

  9 Jun 03, 16:23

  my dear.. this is life.. we had to face all this for lots of reason we have to accept all this fate.. we are born to face death.. why not enjoy it.. jus dun bother this kinda people as...
  
  fren comes and goes.. we have to accept the fact.. we are also one where we come and goes with jus a blink.. into people's life.. ask urself.. "all the frens we had in the past, some stay in contact.. some no.. others who still stay in contact is in the matter of time to part" soo.. as for my thoughts.. i guess its time tat u part with tat fren..
  
  coz there are many out there who are more worth to be frens..
  
  so.. must always look on the bright side of life..
• millennium

  9 Jun 03, 16:37

  Originally posted by oceanic:

  what i meant was that if u forgive n u dun forget e pain and anger is still with u... so tts why

  And what I mean is forgive and don't forget the person betray you before and take it as lesson learn. So that's why.
• lv_gal

  9 Jun 03, 16:45

  Originally posted by millennium:

  For the case it was never said how serious the offence is and how you expect others to judge the seriousness?
  
  It is not easy to be person to be best friend. Because of one betray and best friend can become enemy, I can said that the so call best friend cannot withstand anything at all.
  
  Forgive the best friend, don't forget what he/she had done, take it as a lesson learnt and beware of him/her in future.

  well, she used to be my very best friend whom our friendship can withstand everything. if in ur shoes, what would u do if ur best friend betray u which might ruin ur future etc? thats why up till now (3 yr liao) i still cant forgive the act she did.. i can forget the past but wont show any forgiveness.
• millennium

  9 Jun 03, 16:58

  Originally posted by lv_gal:

  well, she used to be my very best friend whom our friendship can withstand everything. if in ur shoes, what would u do if ur best friend betray u which might ruin ur future etc? thats why up till now (3 yr liao) i still cant forgive the act she did.. i can forget the past but wont show any forgiveness.

  Other than looking at the things done which would ruin the future, I would also look at the good things which my best friend had helped me over the years. To be my best friend, I believe other than can click, most important is we able to helped each other.
  
  People would only looked at how other people treated him/her badly, they wouldn't even bother how much his/her friend had helped them even if there is.
• lv_gal

  9 Jun 03, 17:08

  Originally posted by millennium:

  Other than looking at the things done which would ruin the future, I would also look at the good things which my best friend had helped me over the years. To be my best friend, I believe other than can click, most important is we able to helped each other.
  
  People would only looked at how other people treated him/her badly, they wouldn't even bother how much his/her friend had helped them even if there is.

  dun u kn that "one bad deed u did, for coutless good deed also wont cover it"
  
  eg: father rape daughter; mother kill own flesh, ur friend had sex with ur partner, close one betray u out of $$$ etc
  
  will u forgive them and remembred the good things they had with u b4? u able to forget the suffering they caused to you? if u can, well, i'm can say u r pretty noble... but i cant do till these stages.
• millennium

  9 Jun 03, 17:31

  Originally posted by lv_gal:

  dun u kn that "one bad deed u did, for coutless good deed also wont cover it"
  
  eg: father rape daughter; mother kill own flesh, ur friend had sex with ur partner, close one betray u out of $$$ etc

  You are talking about extreme cases. I think it is better for you to make things clear before we carry on the discussion. Sooner or later you will come out with something new again.
  
  

  will u forgive them and remembred the good things they had with u b4? u able to forget the suffering they caused to you? if u can, well, i'm can say u r pretty noble... but i cant do till these stages.

  I would appreciate you make your point clear before I answer that. Looks like your answer is definitely a no and wouldn't accept anybody to say yes. Than why bother to post in forum in the first place?
• angel911

  9 Jun 03, 18:45

  Originally posted by oceanic:

  agree... there's not a forgiveness if u forgive but u dun forget.. u're just carrying the pain and anger with u when u dun forget

  I agree as well. U see, there's no point telling yourself that all humans are selfish, although it's our sinful nature and bad habits to be more concern about our own self.
  
  Instead, why don't we look into a different and more simple point of view? If we forgive but don't forget, then it's not not total forgiveness that most of you are talking about. It's very easy to forgive others verbally, but being willing to let go of the hatred and hurt the person has caused you, THAT is another thing. If anyone can do just that, then that IS TOTAL FORGIVENESS. Then, that is what we call forgive AND forget.
• oceanic

  9 Jun 03, 20:27

  Originally posted by angel911:

  I agree as well. U see, there's no point telling yourself that all humans are selfish, although it's our sinful nature and bad habits to be more concern about our own self.
  
  Instead, why don't we look into a different and more simple point of view? If we forgive but don't forget, then it's not not total forgiveness that most of you are talking about. It's very easy to forgive others verbally, but being willing to let go of the hatred and hurt the person has caused you, THAT is another thing. If anyone can do just that, then that IS TOTAL FORGIVENESS. Then, that is what we call forgive AND forget.

  
• millennium

  9 Jun 03, 21:46

  Originally posted by angel911:

  I agree as well. U see, there's no point telling yourself that all humans are selfish, although it's our sinful nature and bad habits to be more concern about our own self.
  
  Instead, why don't we look into a different and more simple point of view? If we forgive but don't forget, then it's not not total forgiveness that most of you are talking about. It's very easy to forgive others verbally, but being willing to let go of the hatred and hurt the person has caused you, THAT is another thing. If anyone can do just that, then that IS TOTAL FORGIVENESS. Then, that is what we call forgive AND forget.

  A stupid idiot walked too fast at a junction and knocked down by a bicycle. The stupid idiot forgive the bicycle rider. And at the same time the stupid idiot MUST also forget the incident it in order to be TOTAL FORGIVENESS. The stupid idiot must not remember it at all.
  
  So in future the stupid idiot walk at the junction again, the stupid idiot must not recall the incident and walk quickly as per normal.
  
  This is what I call stupid idiot.