Sex and Marriage
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I once knew a woman who offered her honor
So I honored her offer
And all night long I was on her and off her.
I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them.
Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face and the egg is frowning and looking put out. The egg mutters to no one in particular, "I guess we answered that question."
When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 a minute.
Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.If you made a list of the reasons why any couple got married, and another list of the reasons for their divorce, you'd have a hell of a lot of overlapping.
Valentine's Day is when a lot of married men are reminded what a poor shot Cupid really is.
Three rings of marriage are the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.
My wife says I never listen to her. At least I think that's what she said.
The chief reason why marriage is rarely a success is that it is contracted while the partners are insane.
Mother-in-law: a woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of hers.
Mistress: something between a mister and a mattress.
Wedding rings: the world's smallest handcuffs.
Marriage is not a word - it is a sentence.
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him. After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him.
In the early years, you fight because you don't understand each other. In the later years, you fight because you do.
A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers.
Why do married men gain weight while bachelors don't? Bachelors go to the refrigerator, see nothing they want, then go to bed. Married guys go to the bed, see nothing they want, then go to the refrigerator.
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
Marriage is like a phone call in the night: first the ring, and then you wake up.
When a man opens the car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.
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Nice one!
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intresting one...nice post..haha..
esp>In the early years, you fight because you don't understand each other. In the later years, you fight because you do..
haha i lik tis sentense the most...cox it happen on me..lol
tc tata
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Goodness.... are woman that bad???
It is only marriage must say till like death sentance.... If man wan sex... why propose in the 1st place? haiz.... man always say they can never understand a woman, but seriously... can a woman understand man???
Now i know how marriages comes to an end.... lol (cos both dun understand one another needs)
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Originally posted by Wintergal1980:
Goodness.... are woman that bad???
It is only marriage must say till like death sentance.... If man wan sex... why propose in the 1st place? haiz.... man always say they can never understand a woman, but seriously... can a woman understand man???
Now i know how marriages comes to an end.... lol (cos both dun understand one another needs)
this is not speaker's corner ma.. just a joke only -
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Originally posted by Wintergal1980:
Goodness.... are woman that bad???
It is only marriage must say till like death sentance.... If man wan sex... why propose in the 1st place? haiz.... man always say they can never understand a woman, but seriously... can a woman understand man???
Now i know how marriages comes to an end.... lol (cos both dun understand one another needs)
think i will only happen to u... the bad marriages... look at it this way, y must u look at things too seriously when this is meant to be a joke? that the reason why u don't understand guys.... so dun put all the blame on the male... if u r looking for seriousness, dun come here... this is a joke forum.. not for u