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Marriage Humor （婚姻幽默）

• Evangel

  23 Jul 08, 23:51

  > Wife: 'What are you doing?'
  > 妻：你在�什麼啊？
  > Husband : Nothing.
  > 夫：沒�什麼。
  > Wife : 'Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an
  > hour.'
  > 妻：沒�什麼？你看著我們的�婚證書，足足有一�時了。
  > Husband : 'I was looking for the expiry date.'
  > 夫：我在尋找它的有效日期是到什麼時候。
  > ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------
  > -----
  >
  > Wife : 'Do you want dinner?'
  > 妻： ��晚�嗎？
  > Husband : 'Sure! What are my choices?'
  > 夫： 當然�我�以�擇嗎？
  > Wife : 'Yes or no.'
  > 妻：�或��。
  > ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------
  > -----
  >
  > Wife: 'You always carry my photo in your wallet. Why?'
  > 妻：為什麼你經常把我的照片放在你皮夾裡？
  > Hubby: 'When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your
  > picture and the problem disappears.'
  > 夫：當�題發生時，�管有多困難，我看著妳照片就迎刃而解了。
  > Wife: 'You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you!'
  > 妻：你看我�你有多麼驚人的影響力啊�
  > Hubby: 'Yes! I see your picture and ask myself what other problem can
  > there be greater than this one?'
  > 夫：是啊�望著妳的照片我�自己，還有什麼困難比這個來得大呢？
  > ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------
  > -----
  >
  > Stress Reliever Girl: 'When we get married, I want to share all your
  > worries, troubles and lighten your burden.'
  > 女孩：婚後我�分擔你所有的煩惱�困擾，以減輕你的負擔。
  > Boy: 'It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or
  > troubles.'
  > 男孩：親愛的，妳真體貼，但我並沒有任何煩惱或困擾。
  > Girl: 'Well that's because we aren't married yet.'
  > 女孩：哦？那是因為我們還沒�婚的緣故。
  > ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------
  > -----
  >
  > Son: ' Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to
  > give up my seat to a lady.'
  > �：今早我和爹地一起�車，他�我讓座給一�女士。
  > Mom: 'Well, you have done the right thing.'
  > �：嗯，你這麼�是�的。
  > Son: 'But mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap.'
  > �：但是，媽，我當時是�在爹地的腿上呢。
  > ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____
  >
  > A newly married man asked his wife, 'Would you have married me if my
  > father hadn't left me a fortune?'
  > 一�新婚的先生�他太太：如果我父親沒留下巨�財產給我，你會�給我嗎？
  > 'Honey,' the woman replied sweetly, 'I'd have married you, N O MATTER WHO
  > LEFT YOU A FORTUNE!'
  > 女人溫柔的答�：親愛的，�管是誰留下財產給你，我都會�給你的。
  > ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------
  > -----
  >
  > Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever .
  > 女孩�著男�說：�我一下，我就永�屬於你了。
  > The guy replies: 'Thanks for the early warning.'
  > 男孩回�：��您�早警告我。
  > ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------
  > -----
  >
  > A wife asked her husband: 'What do you like most in me, my pretty face or
  > my sexy body?'
  > 妻�夫：你最喜歡我哪一點？我美麗的臉�，還是我性感的軀體？
  > He looked at her from head to toe and replied: 'I like your sense of
  > humor.'
  > 他把她從頭到腳�覽了一�，回�：我喜歡你的幽默感。