hi, i wanted to post my issue in a forum. tried hwz but my post got removed cos the moderator said its not the right place. so im here to share it. me and my bf has been together for 6 mths now. so far everythin is going well for us. recently we thought abt having intimate moments when he came to my hse. but time aft time nothing happened. so we chat on the phone and he was quite into having sex with me. idk what to reply but since i love him i said ok but only protected sex. he doesnt want. he asked me if i trust him and he promise not to impregnant me. i know the risk and that but hmm having unprotected sex is quite scarry for me... for a week he been asking abt my decision. i kept telling him i dont know... i heard abt withdrawal method but what if he cant control? i dont want to screw my life and at the same time i dont want to disappoing him as he is my bf and i love him alot. im not asking alot, just ask him to have protected sex. im quite confused now. am i on a mistake? i havent done intercourse before so im not too sure with alot of things. we had petting before and alot of times it went to almost sex but then nth happened cos i kept turning him down. any advises people?
the withdrawal method is not 100%, there is a possibility of pregnancy, a smaller one compared to if never withdraw, but it's just a matter of time the possibility catch up because if you all do it once it will happen second time and so on... worse case is if first time genna pregnant then have to go abortion or something...
don't leave it to chance, don't do it. if you do it, be mentally prepared.
don't be like me, i go my girlfriend angel's house she cannot control then violently bang me until i pregnant... i cried all the way to FireIce house then she console me, we sit on the bed then she console me until i lie down on the bed then she bang me again until I pregnant again!!! now i very scared to meet girls.
Originally posted by ChoCoChips:u have to be firm about this.
protected means protected.
if he die die dont wan then u die die dont give him.if he dumps u bcos of this then u know how much he respects/treasures u lo.
its not about breaking up or continuing the r/s just cos of sex. i dont wanna disappoint him. he got urges too so hmm i dont mind if it protected one. say if im 13 days past my last menstrual day, is it less risky?
Originally posted by ChoCoChips:u have to be firm about this.
protected means protected.
if he die die dont wan then u die die dont give him.if he dumps u bcos of this then u know how much he respects/treasures u lo.
Thanks for typing what I wanted to type....
just use a condom.
less risky anot i dunno la.
and i dunno y u dun wan to make him put on protection.
all i noe is if u wan to give in to him and let he do what he wants
den u mus be responsible for the consequences lo.
and lastly, if its not 0%, it can and will happen.
Originally posted by ChoCoChips:less risky anot i dunno la.
and i dunno y u dun wan to make him put on protection.
all i noe is if u wan to give in to him and let he do what he wants
den u mus be responsible for the consequences lo.
and lastly, if its not 0%, it can and will happen.
its not that i dont want. its his choice. this issue is bothering me cos when we meet or talk, theres an awkwardness. so how should i say to him?
If you get regular periods, Then the your Mensus period time is safe for unprotected sex. Its safe only for not getting pregnant. Incase of any Sexually transmitted deseases are there, both of you have to cry after that. to follow this you shoudl get periods for every 28 to 30 days. So be careful.
MAKE SURE YOU FIULM THE WHOLE SEX SESSION AND SHARE THE VIDEO WITH US....................
abstain from it is the best till after marriage..
Originally posted by Chat4fun2011:If you get regular periods, Then the your Mensus period time is safe for unprotected sex. Its safe only for not getting pregnant. Incase of any Sexually transmitted deseases are there, both of you have to cry after that. to follow this you shoudl get periods for every 28 to 30 days. So be careful.
hmm? thought having sex during mensus is guaranteed pregnancy? am i missing something? but whats so difficult to put a latex rubber and do it? i mean...it doesnt make a diff. sigh! i think i should just say no..
Then its Superb if you can say No. No problem at all.
Ask him to marry you, then you can say yes. :-) He will never force you back. :-) Ofcourse, there are some differences with and with out condom.
Originally posted by mardiana:hmm? thought having sex during mensus is guaranteed pregnancy? am i missing something? but whats so difficult to put a latex rubber and do it? i mean...it doesnt make a diff. sigh! i think i should just say no..
from a guy's point of view, there's sure to have a diff..
yea but im overlooking 'pleasure' cos theres other factors outweighing it like...disease and pregnancy! cant believe im putting so much time into this..
at the end of the day, the final decision still lies with you
so better think it through carefully otherwise u might make a decision which u may regret
Originally posted by mardiana:yea but im overlooking 'pleasure' cos theres other factors outweighing it like...disease and pregnancy! cant believe im putting so much time into this..
I think you already know the answer and your priorities - it isn't just about getting pregnant, it is also about diseases - and the reality is.. it is TRUE - if he loves you enough, he will wait. The very fact that you are hesitant means your desire to please him is going against the grain of other values that you believe in.
If a guy pressures you into sex, putting his pleasure before your security - do you think he is someone who respects you?
I'm not against pre-marital sex - I am however against having sex for the wrong reasons!
Originally posted by Asromanista2001:
MAKE SURE YOU FIULM THE WHOLE SEX SESSION AND SHARE THE VIDEO WITH US....................
why you always talk rubbish one...
Originally posted by DailyFreeGames.com:
why you always talk rubbish one...
standard one lah
I hope my post to ts will not be too late.
If your bf love you, likes you alot, why must go into sex?
Obviously he wanted to have sex with you.
After sex, can he be faithful to you? Can he? Of course he will tell you he can, dont worry.
But, trust me, protect your body, your virgin, dont let love blind you.
Men always like that, fuck you, have sex with you, a while later, dump you out for good.
Please dont do it.
You already agree to have sex but just want it to be protected sex, what is wrong with that.
I dont believe you need to bend over and sacrifice and listen to your boyfriend's wishes like that.
If that is the case, he is being selfish, and you need to be more assertive. Dont be afraid to be assertive.
In my opinion you have the right to reject sex entirely. For this case, you already agree to it, so actually it is already a concession. You already make a concession. Now he refuse to even wear a condom ? That means he refuse to make any concession. So is this fair or not fair ?
Like I said dont be afraid to be assertive and ask him to meet you halfway. If he does not want to give any concession but demand full concession from you, then the deal is off. No transaction. You must know how to stand your ground.
TS, stand firm, say no to sex. Protect yourself. So what if he is your bf right?
Tell him let's go for rom before sex. See how is his reaction.
thanks for all the responses hmm. i smsed him last night, quite late abt 2am+. i told him abt my insecurities abt having unprotected sex. he said he undst what im feeling but told me to undst his too. like wtf. im not asking something huge on a favour right...
i do love him and i think having sex is alrite betwn bf and gf as long we both knw the risks and consequences. so i wanna have protected sex like any other girls. btw he told me nt to worry abt STDs cos he is virgin. can i trust him, or any other guys who say that? how do i tell if a guy is sincere with LOVE or LUST when he asks for sex? he is a local chinese frm NP and we got together aft 2 months of knowing each other. im frm jakarta but im staying here since 2000. did he think im a pushover like other malay girls out there? i love him but when i look at this issue, its not even an issue to begin with. as fr last night convo, again i said im not too sure and he never pressed me on that matter again that night. so can i say hes not so despo?
what shld be my next move?
Hi Mardiana, what your bf means is no sex no relationship? Can you tell by the looks whether a man is a virgin or not? Answer is NO. If your bf is a virgin, how come he initiate for sex? Something funny right? Dont fall into the trap of having sex to satisfy yuor bf.
To tell you the truth, guys lost nothing after sex. Guys can have many sex partners, ladies? If you are a virgin, you are done! Gone! Dirty.
So, why not tell your bf if your bf sincerely love and likes you, cant he dont talk about sex? Can the sex will delay till marriage?
Be extremely careful Mardiiana about this move. I just dont wish to hear you after some time posting here to say I get cheated.