PERFORMANCE APPRAISAL TERMS
AND THEIR REAL MEANINGS
1.OUTGOING PERSONALITY....?...Always going out of the office
2.GREAT PRESENTATION SKILLS??...................Able to bullshit
3.GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS....Spends lots of time on phone
4.AVERAGE EMPLOYEE...????..........................Not too bright
5.EXCEPTIONALLY WELL QUALIFIED......Made no major blunders yet
6.WORK IS FIRST PRIORITY...??............Too ugly to get a date
7.ACTIVE SOCIALLY.................??????...............Drinks a lot
8.FAMILY IS ACTIVE SOCIALLY.............??....Spouse drinks, too
9.INDEPENDENT WORKER......?......Nobody knows what he/she does
10.QUICK THINKING.........???...........Offers plausible excuses
11.CAREFUL THINKER.....??..................Won't make a decision
12.AGGRESSIVE.....??????..................................Obnoxious
13.USES LOGIC ON DIFFICULT JOBS...?...Gets someone else to do it
14.EXPRESSES THEMSELVES WELL.....................Speaks English
15.METICULOUS ATTENTION TO DETAIL..................A nit picker
16.HAS LEADERSHIP QUALITIES.......Is tall or has a louder voice
17.EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD JUDGMENT...........................Lucky
18.KEEN SENSE OF HUMOUR..............Knows a lot of dirty jokes
19.CAREER MINDED................????..................Back Stabber
20.LOYAL...????.......................Can't get a job anywhere else
21.CHARACTER ABOVE REPROACH.....Still one step ahead of the law
22.PLANS FOR PROMOTION/ADVANCEMENT??..Buys drinks for all the boys
23.OF GREAT VALUE TO THE ORGANISATION..?...Gets to work on time
24.RELAXED ATTITUDE........................???......Sleeps at desk