New Consent Form
-
Additional to Psychological Experiment Consent Forms
1. You might die at any moment.
2. The experimenter could be mentally undressing you.
3. Because there is no free will, you cannot really consent to this study.
4. Being paid to do this study is not a benefit to you, because money is the root of all evil.
5. Everything the experimenter tells you is probably a lie, including this.
Feel free to add on.
-
The data that you provide may not be accurately reported because it's being processed by some poor shcmuck with a bad case of acne who's just trying to get the year over and done with, while worrying about his exams, driving tests and job interviews - he doesn't have time for data which doesn't fit his hypotheses!
-
You are required to have an rectal temperature of at least 36.4 degrees Celsius - our supervisor put in a specific instruction that we must go out and get warm bodies for this experiment.