this is what i wrote and im submitting to talkingcock.com see you people like it or not (most importantly, whether it is funny?)
In a desperate attempt to heighten Singaporeans' sense of awareness regarding sexual education, the Gahmen recently announced that they will be introducing a 'sexy' twist to our very familiar national songs.
Political pundits agree that this campaign is seemingly borrowing its momentum from the recent and dramatically controversial makeover of POSB to becoming a national sperm bank [http://www.talkingcock.com/html/article.php?sid=1436&mode=thread&order=0]
"Our national songs, like Count On Me Singapore, have always been very very popular. But today, we must stress a whole new dimension about patriotism. In reality, I believe that instead of simply chanting, 'count on me, Singapore!' it makes more sense for Singaporeans to actually moan, 'oh baby, cum on me, Singapore!' We thus will entrench the 'Count on me to cum on her' mentality among Singaporeans" said Minister of Procreation Lim Hng Kiang. "We intend to unleash a nationwide campaign to drill the new versions of familiar national songs into Singaporeans by playing the songs in various radio stations and also on television programmes."
However, the move has angered many parents because of the explicit sexual nature of the new national songs.
"Niao hiah! Nowadays this world very dirty. All Gahmen's fault. Last time I used to masturbate while playing porn videos on my TV. Now even kids can masturbate because of such saucy songs. How can like that! What is our world coming to?" says a very worried Tampenis citizen, Mr. Lim Peh Ka Li Kong.
However, Mr. Limp Hng Kiang brushed away such criticism, saying, " Hng hng hng? Not true! Those parents seriously don't know how to hng, baby." With that, Mr. Limp Hng Kiang proudly flash the lyrics of the new versions of national songs.
CUM ON ME SINGAPORE
[Sing to the tune of Count of me Singapore]
by
[email protected]Kok Kok Klan
There is a new law for us to follow, just believe, just believe
We must make love for Singapore, to make babies, to make babies
Boys and girls, let's do our part, stand together, butt to butt
Our birth rate is getting low, and we must stop it
To make babies, to make babies
There is a need to know sex is good and ain't a sorrow
So let's drop our pants and do what Steve Chia died for
I ejaculated in your ass, it's a disaster Singapore shares
Stop oral and anal sex, oh horny you and me
To make babies, to make babies
Cum on me Singapore, cum on me and on my ass no more
Boys and girls, don't poke your butts, fark together, test your luck
Our birth rate is getting low, and we must stop it
To make babies, to make babies
Chorus:
Cum on me Singapore, cum on me Singapore
Cum on me and on my ass no more
(Repeated Chorus)
Cum on me Singapore Singapore
and more are coming...
cheers!
