Chasing Paradise
-
Chasing Paradise
Behind the wall
lay a man, silent.
He used to smile
but the grins
have recently shrunk.
Intimidated by uncertainty,
stretched far by hope
unsung.
He drew his heart
perhaps she didn't see
he walked in front,
she walked the other way.
But the sky failed
the azure blue blotted
his sight, assumed.
Could it be,
I was only
a little boy
in yesterday's
wild sheep chase?
---
This is probably one of my random musings, uncolorful and not as reflective.
-
paiseh ,cant appreciate
-
So sad, I do like the lines:
but the grins
have recently shrunk.
Intimidated by uncertainty, -
well, it is inspired by true happenings..Originally posted by expiringpoet:So sad, I do like the lines:
but the grins
have recently shrunk.
Intimidated by uncertainty,
glad you like the poem. -
I admire the effort but frankly, your piece seems rather lacking in form and creativity.
-
I'm more of a free poet, and usually disregard form.Originally posted by :I admire the effort but frankly, your piece seems rather lacking in form and creativity.
Creativity wise..this is as i've said, something I simply wrote on the spur. -
It might written on a spur, but I lreally like this. It has this sort of innocent honesty about it.
-
i really like the first stanza cos it seems to describe so well something I've seen happening to people at work... how they came in full of drive and after crashing into the wall a few times, they lose their confidence and become the worst decision makers ever.
-
i like the poem
i think it is about unrequited love.
the last stanza sums it up :
Could it be,
I was only
a little boy
in yesterday's
wild sheep chase?
chasing, but never quite catching hold of it.
-
My dear Lazer, not one of your best but I do love the ending.
