Book of Life (Version Yellow)
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will try to get more jokes up to ease ur revision period!
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Merry Meet To All,
What a sunny day but i am not in a jolly mood today!
Blessed Be,
Oceanos -
just came in for awhile to reply to e posts here...it's a daily habit now...just like reading email regularly like that.stressed like he11 ...dun think i can finish.Originally posted by KFDugong:will try to get more jokes up to ease ur revision period! 
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Originally posted by OCEANOS:
Relax lah brother..... go do some breathing exercises to calm down...than go buy urself some good food n pamper urself...than do a facial n than go sleep...after wake up go for a walk n eat dinner ...than come online n chat lor.
[b]Merry Meet To All,
What a sunny day but i am not in a jolly mood today!
Blessed Be,
Oceanos[/b]
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Quote of the day 2:There was once a young man who was determined to climb a moutain....his parents knew about this n packed enuff food n water for him to last e entire journey.So this man happily went on his way up e moutain....Sometime later...when he was half way thru e journey up,he found himself extremely tired n running out of strength,as it turns out,the food n drinks that his parents were too heavy n was slowing down his progress n sapping his energy....thus e young man decided to abandon this burden n continue up the moutain in a cheerful n lite hearted manner... if u wanna ask whether he reached e top...i will tell u i dunno...becos e story has not ended yet....
Morale of e story anyone???
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Originally posted by OCEANOS:
go take a walk it help....
[b]Merry Meet To All,
What a sunny day but i am not in a jolly mood today!
Blessed Be,
Oceanos[/b]
me sleepy * yawn * -
u r rite...Originally posted by MeOwSuSan:go take a walk it help....
me sleepy * yawn * -
Did you hear about the guy on the beach who found a bottle? He rubbed it and, sure enough, out popped a Genie.
"I will grant you three wishes," said the Genie. "But there's a catch."
"What catch?" he asked.
The Genie replied, "Every time you make a wish, every lawyer in the world will receive DOUBLE what you asked for."
"Well, I can live with that! No problem!" replied the elated man.
"What is your first wish?" asked the Genie.
"Well, I've always wanted a Ferrari."
POOF! A Ferrari appeared in front of the man.
"NOW, every lawyer in the world has TWO Ferraris," said the Genie.
"Next wish?"
"I'd LOVE a million dollars..." replied the man.
POOF! One million dollars appeared at his feet.
"NOW, every lawyer in the world has TWO MILLION dollars," said the Genie.
"Well, that's okay, as long as I've got MY million," replied the man.
"What is your final wish?"
The man thought long and hard, and finally said, "Well, you know, I've always wanted to donate a kidney...." -
There were 11 people hanging onto a rope that came down from a plane. (I don't know how they got there -- it's a joke, okay.) Ten were blonde, and one was brunette. They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn't, the rope would break and everyone would die.
No one could decide who should go, so finally the brunette gave a really touching speech, saying how she would give up her life to save the others.
All of the blondes started clapping.
p.s. no offence to the blondes hor -
Bubba died in a fire and his body was burnt pretty bad. The morgue needed someone to identify the body, so his two best friends, Daryl and Gomer, were sent for.
Daryl went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet. Daryl said, "Yup, he's burnt pretty bad. Roll him over." The mortician rolled him over, and Daryl said, "Nope, ain't Bubba."
The mortician thought that was rather strange. Then he brought Gomer in to identify the body. Gomer took a look at him and said, "Yup, he's burnt real bad, roll him over." The mortician rolled him over and Gomer said, "No, it ain't Bubba."
The mortician asked, "How can you tell?"
Gomer said, "Well, Bubba had two assholes."
"What? He had two assholes?" said the mortician.
"Yup, everyone in town knew he had two assholes. Every time we went to town, folks would say, 'Here comes Bubba with them two assholes.' -
Due to increasing products liability litigation, beer manufacturers have accepted the Medical Association's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containers:
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a wanker.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to smash your head in.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex- lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your trousers.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose name and/or species you can't remember).
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, more attractive, and smarter than some really, really big guy named Franz.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing with you.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause a flux in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually cause pregnancy. -
Joe grew up in a small town, then moved away to attend college and law school. He decided to come back to the small town because he could be a big man in this small town. He really wanted to impress everyone. He opened his new law office, but business was very slow at first.
One day, he saw a man coming up the sidewalk. He decided to make a big impression on this new client when he arrived. As the man came to the door, Joe picked up the phone. He motioned the man in, all the while talking. "No. Absolutely not. You tell those clowns in New York that I won't settle this case for less than one million. Yes. The Appeals Court has agreed to hear that case next week. I'll be handling the primary argument and the other members of my team will provide support. Okay. Tell the DA that I'll meet with him next week to discuss the details. "
This sort of thing went on for almost five minutes. All the while the man sat patiently as Joe rattled instructions. Finally, Joe put down the phone and turned to the man. "I'm sorry for the delay, but as you can see, I'm very busy. What can I do for you?"
The man replied, "I'm from the phone company. I came to hook up your phone." -
always climb a mountain with a donkey to hold ur food and water.. and some grass for the donkeyOriginally posted by harryryan:Quote of the day 2:There was once a young man who was determined to climb a moutain....his parents knew about this n packed enuff food n water for him to last e entire journey.So this man happily went on his way up e moutain....Sometime later...when he was half way thru e journey up,he found himself extremely tired n running out of strength,as it turns out,the food n drinks that his parents were too heavy n was slowing down his progress n sapping his energy....thus e young man decided to abandon this burden n continue up the moutain in a cheerful n lite hearted manner... if u wanna ask whether he reached e top...i will tell u i dunno...becos e story has not ended yet....
Morale of e story anyone??? -
Merry Meet To All,
Its a busy day so far, I am cleaning up my room now! My God hope i can finish by today.
Blessed Be,
Oceanos -
Originally posted by OCEANOS:
its so messy??? sure u can do it...
[b]Merry Meet To All,
Its a busy day so far, I am cleaning up my room now! My God hope i can finish by today.
Blessed Be,
Oceanos[/b] -
Anderson Consultant:
Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM) Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Andersen consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park like setting enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful. -
it is a very steep moutain lah-_-!!!Originally posted by KFDugong:always climb a mountain with a donkey to hold ur food and water.. and some grass for the donkey -
Seems like business is slow in LOA tonite.... will be sleeping liao...gotta go skool tomorrow to record voice over...good note everyone.
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some donkeys can climb everest... sure can make itOriginally posted by harryryan:it is a very steep moutain lah-_-!!! -
Originally posted by KFDugong:some donkeys can climb everest... sure can make it so power ah???
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Power???Originally posted by harryryan: so power ah???
Power Rangers-Donkey storm??? -
.. got sapphire version?
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wat spahire version?u think pokemon huh?Originally posted by Ito_^:.. got sapphire version? -
i prefer digimonOriginally posted by waliao:wat spahire version?u think pokemon huh? -
Q: Which Pokemon is related to ET?
A: Eevee
Q: What Pokemon has a flu?
A: Pika-achoo!
Q: Heard of the low-fat Pokemon?
A: Butter-free
Q: Why doesn't Blastoise ever share?
A: Because he's a selfish (shellfish) Pokemon
Q: What Pokemon acts like a train?
A: PIKA-CHU-CHU
Q: Why doesn't Ash ever go to a resteraunt?
A: Because they always serve an odd-dish (Oddish)
Q: Why did the Pokemon go to the hospital?
A: Because its bulb is sore (Bulbasaur)
Q: Why did Pichu go to the bathroom?
A: Because it needed to go "Pi".
Q: How do you get a pikachu on to a bus?
A: You Pokemon! (poke him on)