Ramblings
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Ramblings I
I wonder if I will ever be able to find the guy of my dreams, even if I do find him, would I be the girl of his dreams? I must strive to be the best in everything so that I can be his dream girl and not let anyone down again. But it really is so difficult to be somebodyÂ’s dream girl. It really takes a lot to be the perfect one. ThereÂ’s so much that I have to do and everything requires a lot of perseverance.
I really think going overseas will be good for me. Only then will I truly know whether I can make it by myself, and also where in my life I need to make improvements on. I need to learn how to handle situations, how to control my own actions and emotions. I need to grow up, and not think only of myself.
Love, what is true love? Will I be able to find true love? Or will I be like the many who marry thinking that they are right for each other and yet in the end they split up? I really donÂ’t want my marriage to end up wrecked. If that happens, it would probably be the end of me.
If only relationships grew stronger and not weaker. Why canÂ’t everything be simple? Why must relationships be so complicated? IÂ’m really sick of leading a complicated life in a complicated world. -
the above was written abt 2 yrs ago, when i was 19...
was just flipping through my diary when i came across it n decided to share with all of u....
for pple who have diaries, do u ever re-read them like years later?
if so, dun u think that besides being amusing it really tells a lot about yourself? about how u've matured in thinking, about the things that you hold important, about the way your thought process goes? -
Ramblings II
why does it seem like no one cares? I mean sure, there are people who ask 'wat's wrong' but when u tell them, all they say is 'it's ur own problem, u have to settle it yourself', then wat's the point in asking the first place???
I'm so vexed now, virtually going crazy but no one seems to care, even a fren of 11 yrs can tell me to settle it myself, of course I noe I have to settle it myself, but I just need someone to listen. Listen to one line then ask me to settle myself is not called listening!
Is it me? Is there something seriously wrong with me? Why is it that I have so many close frens but no one seems to understand me? Why is it that when someone finally seems to understand me, it is someone I just met n I m told not to get too close by another fren?
I know I am rambling here but I am really really very very frustrated... I want to write a story but don't know what to write.... What has happened to my imagination? I long to escape into a different so it shouldn't be difficult to write something but yet hen I sit down and write, my mind turns blank..... Absolutely blank!
Am I really going crazy?? -
dear Oriosis~~ are u very stressed up??~~
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sigh...................................................Originally posted by IamAngeline:dear Oriosis~~ are u very stressed up??~~
very very very very very................... -
tok to me loh~~Originally posted by ~Or|oS|s~:sigh...................................................
very very very very very...................
/me here to help you~~ -
SIGH................Originally posted by IamAngeline:tok to me loh~~
/me here to help you~~
dunno where to start.......... -
okok I help you~~~~Originally posted by ~Or|oS|s~:SIGH................
dunno where to start..........
girl relax~~~ are u feeling veri tired?~~ -
no, i slept quite early last night........Originally posted by IamAngeline:okok I help you~~~~
girl relax~~~ are u feeling veri tired?~~
at least much earlier than every night for the past week......... -
oh~~~ then ok mah~ kekkekeke~~~~Originally posted by ~Or|oS|s~:no, i slept quite early last night........
at least much earlier than every night for the past week.........
hmmm actually u are working or studying rite now?~ -
studying in NUS but now exams over so working, part time, as promoter.... i oso give tuition........Originally posted by IamAngeline:oh~~~ then ok mah~ kekkekeke~~~~
hmmm actually u are working or studying rite now?~
i not vexed cos not enuff slp, that's not enuff to get me vexed...... -
oh i c~~~~ vexed about life right~~Originally posted by ~Or|oS|s~:studying in NUS but now exams over so working, part time, as promoter.... i oso give tuition........
i not vexed cos not enuff slp, that's not enuff to get me vexed...... -
Hullo there ...
Originally posted by ~Or|oS|s~:
[/b]
Ramblings II
why does it seem like no one cares? I mean sure, there are people who ask 'wat's wrong' but when u tell them, all they say is 'it's ur own problem, u have to settle it yourself', then wat's the point in asking the first place???
[b] Sometimes when someone tells u to settle it yourself it means that u have to take responsibility of your ownself, it does not mean, he/she is not interested/dun care but rather to reinforce the pt that its ur life and if u need to do something to fix the problem
I'm so vexed now, virtually going crazy but no one seems to care, even a fren of 11 yrs can tell me to settle it myself, of course I noe I have to settle it myself, but I just need someone to listen. Listen to one line then ask me to settle myself is not called listening!
These so called frens of yours are not exactly listeners ... Do you have someone who can sit down wif u and listen to u ramble on and on wifout interruptions ?
Is it me? Is there something seriously wrong with me? Why is it that I have so many close frens but no one seems to understand me? Why is it that when someone finally seems to understand me, it is someone I just met n I m told not to get too close by another fren?
Its not u ... I get these feelings sometime too. But who better to understand urself than u personally and mabbe ur other half ?
I know I am rambling here but I am really really very very frustrated... I want to write a story but don't know what to write.... What has happened to my imagination? I long to escape into a different so it shouldn't be difficult to write something but yet hen I sit down and write, my mind turns blank..... Absolutely blank!
Am I really going crazy??[/b]
Life's never a breeze, its full of ups and downs,
if nothing happens in your life, its boring
but if something happens to your life, its complicated.
Take it in your stride ... dere's alwiz tomorrow to look forth to!
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i noe that i need to solve the problem myself n i noe i need to do something, but it's jus very vexing n argh........Originally posted by szehao:Sometimes when someone tells u to settle it yourself it means that u have to take responsibility of your ownself, it does not mean, he/she is not interested/dun care but rather to reinforce the pt that its ur life and if u need to do something to fix the problem .
no one i think..............Originally posted by szehao:These so called frens of yours are not exactly listeners ... Do you have someone who can sit down wif u and listen to u ramble on and on wifout interruptions ?
dun have a other half anymore........ jus broke up, but even when we were together, i dun ramble to him, cos he doesn't understand me, that was one of the reasons y we broke up........Originally posted by szehao:Its not u ... I get these feelings sometime too. But who better to understand urself than u personally and mabbe ur other half ?
i dun understand myself.........
but when i think of tomolo, it jus seems like there are so many more problems ahead.........Originally posted by szehao:Life's never a breeze, its full of ups and downs,
if nothing happens in your life, its boring
but if something happens to your life, its complicated.
Take it in your stride ... dere's alwiz tomorrow to look forth to! -
vexed bt everything........Originally posted by IamAngeline:oh i c~~~~ vexed about life right~~
sigh........
guess i m kicking up a big fuss over nothing rite? -
Cheer upOriginally posted by ~Or|oS|s~:but when i think of tomolo, it jus seems like there are so many more problems ahead......... ...
you seem very bordered by your problem
I can't tell you what to do becuz
firstly i dun noe wat's ur problem (if u wanna share, i dun mind listening),
secondly i am not u ....
Only u noe how to best solve your own problem ...
My best shot is that the breakup wif ur bf is weighting on you very much, and possibly
the exams oso ? -
i'm bothered bt my bf, or rather ex cos we jus broke up 2 days ago.... he's asking to tok to me but i dunno wat to say to him....Originally posted by szehao:Cheer up ...
you seem very bordered by your problem
I can't tell you what to do becuz
firstly i dun noe wat's ur problem (if u wanna share, i dun mind listening),
secondly i am not u ....
Only u noe how to best solve your own problem ...
My best shot is that the breakup wif ur bf is weighting on you very much, and possibly
the exams oso ?
exams over liow but i deferred 2 papers, but dunno when i the make up, mid may maybe......
i dunno how best to solve the prob.... mayb i would if i sat down n thought abt it but every time i start to think, my mind goes blank.... -
Gup ...Originally posted by ~Or|oS|s~:i'm bothered bt my bf, or rather ex cos we jus broke up 2 days ago.... he's asking to tok to me but i dunno wat to say to him....
exams over liow but i deferred 2 papers, but dunno when i the make up, mid may maybe......
i dunno how best to solve the prob.... mayb i would if i sat down n thought abt it but every time i start to think, my mind goes blank....
I'm treading into new "terrain" here ... heehee
Ok ... how should i start ... I guess the reason why ur mind alwiz go blank is becuz u dun wanna tink abt de problem ...
which is a good sign too ... y ?
Becuz u hope the problem gets away wif time ...
So basically for ur bf problem ...
Why dun u juz ignore him ... Cuz i guess the reason why he wants to speak to u again is that he wants to makeup wif u or tat he wants to explain the breakup ... which is wat u do not need now (the additional stress) let time solve ur problem.
If after sometime u tink u reallie cherish ur relationship ... u can look him up again ...
This the best i can do man ... I'm pretty inexperienced myself ... heehee
Exam problem ....
wah kao ... kanna becuz of the SARS thingie ah ... sianz ... the medical checks reallie boh liao ... aniwae de make up is yes ... 3 weeks after last dae of exams ... so this problem will go away wif time too ...
Yeah ... so dun think too much abt it lah ...
/Me is a better listener than adviser ... -
new terrain?? dun get...Originally posted by szehao:Gup ... I'm treading into new "terrain" here ... heehee
Ok ... how should i start ... I guess the reason why ur mind alwiz go blank is becuz u dun wanna tink abt de problem ...
which is a good sign too ... y ?
Becuz u hope the problem gets away wif time ...
So basically for ur bf problem ...
Why dun u juz ignore him ... Cuz i guess the reason why he wants to speak to u again is that he wants to makeup wif u or tat he wants to explain the breakup ... which is wat u do not need now (the additional stress) let time solve ur problem.
If after sometime u tink u reallie cherish ur relationship ... u can look him up again ...
This the best i can do man ... I'm pretty inexperienced myself ... heehee
Exam problem ....
wah kao ... kanna becuz of the SARS thingie ah ... sianz ... the medical checks reallie boh liao ... aniwae de make up is yes ... 3 weeks after last dae of exams ... so this problem will go away wif time too ...
Yeah ... so dun think too much abt it lah ...
/Me is a better listener than adviser ...
but that jus measn i'm escaping, n dun want to face up to it rite?
i cannot ignore him..... too cruel......
i noe i dun want to get back with him.... no matter wat..... it would b a mistake...
u oso in NUS?? agreed the check ups very bo liao, anyway if u are found to have higher temp, they jus bring u go another venue n take, isolate u... so bo liao.... says 3 wks later but i received mail from dean's office saying the make-ups start from 12 may onwards, so may end up both papers on 12th may, jia lat... n will onli noe on 6th may the schedule...
mayb mayb not.... u're ok so far...
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Just want to add my 2 cents worth.. why don't you just relax, take a step back and look at things from a different perspective/angle? maybe that would help.. talking to your bf might also be a good thing since it would clear that out of the way and leave you fresh to handle other things like your deferred papers as well.. good luck
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New terrain == i haven't done dis kind of advicing for a long time liaoz ... b4 entering nus ... spent 2 and half years running up and down mountainsOriginally posted by ~Or|oS|s~:new terrain?? dun get...
but that jus measn i'm escaping, n dun want to face up to it rite?
i cannot ignore him..... too cruel......
i noe i dun want to get back with him.... no matter wat..... it would b a mistake...
u oso in NUS?? agreed the check ups very bo liao, anyway if u are found to have higher temp, they jus bring u go another venue n take, isolate u... so bo liao.... says 3 wks later but i received mail from dean's office saying the make-ups start from 12 may onwards, so may end up both papers on 12th may, jia lat... n will onli noe on 6th may the schedule...
mayb mayb not.... u're ok so far... 
Hey ... u think running away from reality is alwiz bad ? Sometimes its the best solution u can find ... reallie i'm not joking ... cauz i got this bf-gf problem last yr and guess wat ... i ran away from it ... i pretend to be an idiot and ignore calls/etc ... A'greed its a cruel solution but its the best solution.
Why get urself upset again ?
Afterall u said u noe u dun wanna get back wif him again ...
And yes I'm in NUS ... haven't finish exam yet ... tomolo afternoon last paper ... arrrrghhH!
Think ur papers wun clash lah ... but mabbe kena one morning and one afternoon kinda schedule ... which is quite shitty lah ! Cauz i oso got one dae kanna lidat!
So wat's ur temperature when u went to take it ... I got one dae reached 37.5, the screener like want to take action liaoz ... but luckily i gave him the begging look den he say okok ...go ! -
thank you!!Originally posted by tinybird:Just want to add my 2 cents worth.. why don't you just relax, take a step back and look at things from a different perspective/angle? maybe that would help.. talking to your bf might also be a good thing since it would clear that out of the way and leave you fresh to handle other things like your deferred papers as well.. good luck
wow.... u joined so long ago but onli post once n u posted in reply to me!! so touched.....
but i dunno wat to say to him..... i will tok to him but not now, but he wants now.... i need some time to sort out my thinking first b4 i can tok to him.... if tok to him now i will jus get frustrated n that won't do any good..... -
Originally posted by szehao:New terrain == i haven't done dis kind of advicing for a long time liaoz ... b4 entering nus ... spent 2 and half years running up and down mountains
Hey ... u think running away from reality is alwiz bad ? Sometimes its the best solution u can find ... reallie i'm not joking ... cauz i got this bf-gf problem last yr and guess wat ... i ran away from it ... i pretend to be an idiot and ignore calls/etc ... A'greed its a cruel solution but its the best solution.
Why get urself upset again ?
Afterall u said u noe u dun wanna get back wif him again ...
And yes I'm in NUS ... haven't finish exam yet ... tomolo afternoon last paper ... arrrrghhH!
Think ur papers wun clash lah ... but mabbe kena one morning and one afternoon kinda schedule ... which is quite shitty lah ! Cauz i oso got one dae kanna lidat!
So wat's ur temperature when u went to take it ... I got one dae reached 37.5, the screener like want to take action liaoz ... but luckily i gave him the begging look den he say okok ...go !
u mean the puppy dog look??
i din go sch.... i went to c outside doc n filled in the special consideration form.....
but everyone say i cannot run away from problem.....
some more he oso in NUS, same circle of frens.....
i not scared bt papers, but i noe confirm get lousy grade.....
think i get fan easily........ -
haha.. i don't come here often.. just thought i'd scan some posts and came by yours, and it touched me because i kinda know what you're going through, and i just wanted to let you know that you're not alone.. so don't feel that way let your bf know that he needs to give you space and time to gather yourself; he should understand and grant you this at the very least..
btw. we're both fellow acjcians
Originally posted by ~Or|oS|s~:thank you!!
wow.... u joined so long ago but onli post once n u posted in reply to me!! so touched.....
but i dunno wat to say to him..... i will tok to him but not now, but he wants now.... i need some time to sort out my thinking first b4 i can tok to him.... if tok to him now i will jus get frustrated n that won't do any good..... -
Originally posted by tinybird:haha.. i don't come here often.. just thought i'd scan some posts and came by yours, and it touched me because i kinda know what you're going through, and i just wanted to let you know that you're not alone.. so don't feel that way let your bf know that he needs to give you space and time to gather yourself; he should understand and grant you this at the very least..
btw. we're both fellow acjcians realli?? u saw my posts in the other thread..... which yr grad from AC?
i hope he can give me the space oso..... but he say he cannot take it, must tok to me..... sigh.........
thank you for ur concern..... realli appreciate it......